PLEASE READ AUTHORS DESCRIPTION BEFORE READING THE STORY. (trust me you'll be glad you did.)
                                             chapter 1
                                           sex and nightmares

I sat on the crimson couch in my small apartment, waiting for Harvey and Joker to show up. I just spent two hours working my ass off to clean up this dump so that it looked at least decent to the ex politician and clown crime lord. I sighed, stretched my aching legs out onto the cushiony pillows and stared at the TV blaring the latest news in Gotham. Again it was the usual news, Joker killed someone or set some place on fire, Harvey was still getting revenge on his bitch fiancé, and the batman was always there to beat the shit out of them for “misbehaving.”
After ten minutes of the news anchors mind numbing blabbering I turned the channel to some music video for an over popular band that was only loved because all the people in it are hot.
“Where the hell is this world coming to?” I moaned and semi laughed at the same time. In the video a lovely couple made out then promised each other they would be together forever. My pained at the sight and I remembered how Joker and I did that once before we broke out of Arkham. Oh that one kiss was the best moment of my life so far and god it felt like it was ages ago instead of five months.  We haven’t touched each other since besides an occasional hug or kiss on the cheek. I let out another depressed sigh and held back the tears that were forming at my light blue eyes.
There was a quick knock on my door that interrupted my thoughts. I wiped my eyes a bit turned off the TV, then muttered “It’s about time they showed up.” My legs screamed in pain as I got up from my relaxing spot on the couch and opened the red door to my apartment. I swung the door open and found the man with the green hair and painted white face, black almost raccoon like circles around his eyes and red lipstick covering his mouth scars.
“Hello Jonathan.” He smiled and I let him in. I noticed immediately that “bacon face” as I like to call him (defiantly not in front of the guy) was not here with Joker.
“Hey J. Where’s Harv?” Joker went and sat on my couch and motioned for me to come sit by him.
“Um…He’s running a little late. Come sit by me love. I have lots to talk about with you.” Hmm. That’s weird. I thought that J and Harvey were partners in crime. I sat by the clown but not as close as I wanted to be. Joker must have seen the desire to be close to him in my eyes because as soon as I sat down he scooted his body closer to mine. I held back a blush as he put his purple gloved hand onto mine.
“So what did you want to talk about?” I tried pulling my hand away but failed. My heart was beating faster by every second he sat next to me.
“I just wanted to know about how you’ve been doing.” He leaned in closer and I felt my face flush.
“Um…a….I’ve been okay. Just a little sore and all but you wouldn’t care to talk about it.” I was so nervous and I prayed that Harvey would show up soon so I wouldn’t make a fool of myself.
“Oh Scarecrow! Just because I’m the big bad Joker that doesn’t mean I don’t’ care about my Johnny.” I flinched at my old nickname from Arkham. Joker smiled his crooked smile, let go of my hand, and put his arm around my shoulder. “Please tell me why my lovely Scarecrow is in pain.” He kissed my neck very lightly which made my head spin with joy so I could barely think.
“I…ah….tripped over a lot of boxes of chemicals while cleaning and was on my legs a lot today and stuff…..” I sounded so stupid right now. Ugh I hate myself for it but I doubt he cares.
“I’m sorry.” He pulled me into a half hug. I looked up into his emerald eyes and I could tell he meant every word.
“How are you?” I managed to yelp out after a couple seconds of an awkward silence. He let out a small creepy laugh and let go of me.
“Marvelous.” He leaned in closer into me. Close enough that are faces were inches away from touching. My heart beat ten times faster then it ever had before and I feared that it would burst out of my chest. It didn’t help that Joker put his gloved hand through my hair.  He leaned his make-up covered face in and put his lips to my ear.
“Has anyone told you lately how beautiful you are?” I felt all the heat rushing to my face. God damn it why do I blush so easy when I’m around him?
“Um….not that I can remember.” This wasn’t true but if it pleased J then I don’t care about all the others who told me this on a daily basis. Joker frowned. That’s right the man with the permeate smile on his face frowned! He pulled away from my ear briefly as if I said something wrong and I looked away as soon as he did.
“Jonathan?” I didn’t look up but muttered a “what?” instead.
“Jonathan look at me.” He didn’t sound angry but more concerned. I slowly pulled my head up to find that J was waiting for me. His red lips planted themselves on mine sending a shock wave down my whole body. After the shock wore off I relaxed a bit and opened my mouth to welcome in the Jokers warm tongue. His glove hand was running through my hair as I grabbed a handful of his green curls. I moaned as he bit my lip. He pulled away from my lips to take in a deep breath of air and then put his lips to my neck.
“J!” I panted and he bit down on my neck making me moan even louder the before. “What about Harvey?” he pulled away from me and looked at me as if I was the crazy one.
“Harvey? Oh you don’t have to worry about him. He’s not coming over.”
“Wait? What the hell do you mean by he’s not coming over?” Joker let out one of his famous laughs and I felt myself frowning, not getting his joke at all.
“Well….I sort of…told him that the meeting was tomorrow and set him up on a date with Edward. You know Riddler. He seems to make Harvey happy since I blew up his last squeeze.”
“Why?” I crossed my arms and scowled at him.
“I just showed you why. I wanted some quality time alone with you.” He purred and before I could be any angrier at him he pulled me by my favorite tie back to his lips. He started to pull of his large purple jacket and I soon followed with my own. Joker startled his legs over mine and pushed me back into the couch. Are kisses begun to get deeper and deeper until I finally pulled away.
“What’s wrong?” Joker panted and gave me a suspicious look.  
“The bedroom….” I panted and he interrupted me.
“What about it love?” he removed his gloves then started working on my tie. I grabbed his purple and green striped one and started pulling it off, while trying to remember what I wanted to say. I started to unbutton his green vest while he groped for my white under shirt. The vest fell down to the ground and my hands instantly started working on his green and white undershirt, while I did this I finally remembered what I wanted to say.
“It’s more comfortable then the couch.” I somehow managed to push my body away from his a get up off the couch before he grabbed my hand and tried to pull me back down.
“Jonathan! Please I need this now. We don’t have to be on a bed the couch is perfectly fine.” he sounded just like a five year old whose mother wouldn’t let him have a cookie. Was that what he thought I was? Some kind of personal treat? I tried to pull away from him but his grip was too tight. He did seem to have muscles underneath his large purple jacket.
“No. trust me J you’ll thank me in the morning. Plus what would you do if Harvey and Eddy decided to call it quits early and he found out he was suppose to come here today?” he let a smile “oh” then let go of my hand. I smiled at him and continued to walk towards my bedroom knowing that the Joker was following from behind him. I started to relax and mentally try and prepare myself for what we were going to do in the bedroom when J turned me around and slammed my back up agents the door to my room.
At first I had no idea what was going on but then it all came to me when J pulled his destroyed lips way from mine.
“I’m so sorry for hurting you but I got so impatient.” I just know noticed the pain in my back and cringed at the thought of how big the bruise was going to be. I somehow managed to open the door with my left hand and grab a handful of his greasy green hair before accepting his apology.
“It’s okay. I’ve wanted this for such a long time.” I whispered in his ear as he surprisingly lifted my body with ease and carried me bridal style to the bed. My heart pounded with every step he took.
“I have to Jonathan.” He whispered back and set me down.
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The room seemed to spin and it was twice of as dark as my bedroom or apartment all together was. I knew I was dreaming about something that looked a hell of a lot like a nightmare.
I sat alone in the dark room before I looked down and saw a small girl who looked about four or five lying in my arms. She looked like an angle. She had beautiful long natural blonde hair with flawless curls. She had pail white skin and large blue eyes. My heart melted at the sight of her.
“Daddy.” Was she talking to me? I don’t ever remember having a kid. I know it’s just dream but she seems so….life like.
“Yes?”
“Please keep the bad man away from me.” She hugged me tighter as I watched a person move from the shadows. It was the Batman. He moved silently towards the little girl. Her body shook with every second he came near.
“Batman! Get the hell out of here! Your scaring this poor girl!” I snarled. How dare he scare this beautiful angel! I’ll kill the bastard if he touches her!
“I only want the child scarecrow. She doesn’t deserve to be raised in the environment you and that damn clown have brought her into.” I hated his raspy voice and couldn’t help but wonder what he meant by that last statement. Anger filled through my veins and I hugged the child tighter.
“You can never have her!” he ran at me and the girl screamed. I tried using my free hand to hold him back but his strong spandex covered hand slapped it away as if it was an annoying fly.
“Leave her alone!” I screamed at him and let go of the girl. “Run!” I felt better as she ran as fast as her legs could carry her. I pulled my body in front of the bat and tried to distract him and give the poor girl long enough time to get away.
“Move.” He glared at me when I wouldn’t let him passed. I didn’t say anything and continued to block his way. I prepared myself for the pain that he was about to inflict on me.
“Fine then.” He stated. He picked me up by the shirt collar, while I tried to kick my way out of his grasp, and he through me to the side. He rushed at the poor girl and was almost instantly behind her. I turned around, while still on the ground but found out I was paralyzed. I tried to scream at her to run faster but found that no words came out. He grabbed her and she disappeared in a sea of crows.
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“No! God damn it! Leave her alone!” I found myself shouting at no one. Joker was lying next to me looking confused and concerned when I began to shake in fear as I recalled every little detail of my nightmare. J pulled me into a tight hug and began shush me.
“I’m s-sorry. This happens when… I’ve been working with fear gas. It affects me to.”
“It’s okay Johnny. Just calm down and go back to sleep, love.” He began to stroke my hair. I felt calm in his arms and slowly started to drift back into a more peaceful sleep.
“J?”I didn’t realize I spoke his name until he gave a fait grunt. He was falling asleep as well.
“What is your real name? You know mine but I have no idea what yours is.” He gave a quiet laugh then purred in my ear.
“Oh Jonathan. Always asking questions.”
“Please. I really want to know and I promise I’ll keep it a secret ple-.” He cut me off.
“Quiet. I trust you. Hmm let me think…..it’s been so many years since I’ve used it.” There was a small silence. Anticipation flooded through my veins. “I believe it was Jack Napier.”
“Jack Napier…” I repeated once before going half back to sleep before realizing what I really wanted to say just in case he wasn’t still here in the morning. “I love you Jack.”
“I love you to Jonathan…..” I smiled and closed my eyes while allowing let sleep take a hold of me.
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Light pored in from the windows. That and the fact that every part of my body ached from some form of scratch or bruise left by my newsiest lover. What could I say the Joker liked to play ruff. I stretched my long arms trying to wake myself up a little bit before examining all the damage Jack left on me.
I let out a small yelp of surprise when I find that Jack was gone and in his place was my folded cloths and a note. I sighed and my good mood darkened. Did I really expect the king of crime to stay? I picked up the note and began to read the messy hand writing.
                                                
                                           Dear Jonathan,
I had a great time last night. We should defiantly do it again some time. The only thing I ask of you it to keep my name a secret. (No Harvey, no Edward, and defiantly no Batman, like you would talk to him any way.) You may notice that your lovely tie is gone. Ha-ha lets just say it will keep me from missing you to much since things have changed and I wouldn’t meet you and Harvey tonight. Don’t worry you can have mine
Love always,
                      Jack

He signed it with his creepy smiley face. That bastard stole my favorite tie and he gave me his ugly one! What the hell? I looked down and there was more.

PS I felt you something. You’ll probably find it on the local news stations at noon.

“Great more surprises.” I glanced at the digital clock on my dresser. The time was 11:45. I had fifteen minutes till the news came on. Just enough time to check the damage and take a shower. I forced myself to get out of bed. My legs cried out in pain but I kept walking.
I got to the bathroom and shut the door. I had already prepared myself mentally for what my face might look like. To my surprise it wasn’t the worst part of me. There were bits and pieces of Jokers make up left on my lips and neck. The only thing that would take a while to get off was a couple of love bites on my neck. I scanned over my dark brown hair to see if there was any sign of red lipstick. There was none and I dared to lower my eyes to look at my torso.
There were deep red scratch marks mixed with large purple and blue bruises all over my stomach. I didn’t want to see how may back looked but I knew it had to be ten times worse. Thank god I didn’t plan on meeting with anybody at the moment because most likely some one with a weak stomach would be sick.
I eventually stopped staring at myself and jumped into the shower. i turned the knob and cried in pain as the cold water hit my skin.
“God damn it.” I whispered through my teeth. “This is going to be a long day.”
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I sat down on the old couch where the best night of my life started and almost ended. I tried sitting down comfortably but my back side hurt more then any other part of my body. I tried to ignore the pain and enjoy my bowl of cheap genetic cereal, while waiting for the news to start. I had three or so minutes so I ran my free hand through my wet hair, then tried to straiten my “new” tie which I already hated it for how it looked but loved it at the same time because of the person it came from.
“Breaking new today.” The news anchor spoke with a false smile on his face. “The Joker struck another fire department this morning this time leaving a note behind.” I scooted to the edge of my seat to get a better look at the image before me. In burning words all over the street his message read “I love you Johnny!” I felt happiness flood through my veins as I knew it was him because of the nickname and signature smile in the bottom of the burning message.
I felt tears flood into my eyes and I whispered to the TV, not caring if any one heard me or not, “I love you too Jokey.”